The Young and the Restless

Posted by Cynical Sarah on August 4, 2007

These days I seem to be completely unmotivated. I go through phases where I’m stoked to take on new things, find new ways to make my life exciting and work on projects, like this Web site, that give me a creative outlet.

Right now I’m in the low point of that phase where even though I feel restless and really need outlets, I’m completely unmotivated to use them.

I’ve been slacking on doing my own column for the site. You may have noticed there wasn’t an update last Monday. I have a semblance of an excuse because the hubby and I had a wedding to go to out of town and we took a couple extra days off just to enjoy the weekend and have a breather for the summer.

We had a good time out of town for the weekend, but we were home in plenty of time for me to update my sight – if I’d wanted to.

But I had no inspiration, no ideas to run with and no motivation to do it. And that’s pretty much how I’ve felt about everything. Even though I feel restless with a few parts of my life, I’m lacking the drive I need to take steps to change that.

I don’t work on my site as much as I should. I don’t work on that book I should be writing. I don’t follow through on the ideas I have to move things in the direction I want to go.

I’ve heard people talk about how the younger generation just isn’t content with anything. It might be something I’ll “grow out of,” this crazy restless period in my life. Or maybe I’m just content to be restless right now. It’s easier and it’s familiar.

Perhaps I’ve become one of those people who prefer to have things feel bad so there’s something to talk and bitch about with people. Everybody likes a good misery story right? Wrong.

I’m pretty sure people are tired of hearing about my issues, because I’m finding that I’m annoying myself with the negativity now too … and just like you know you’ve got some bad body funk going on when you can smell it yourself, you know you must be annoying as hell when you can’t stand yourself.

So it’s time to announce last call for my pity party and let the guests go home.

Not to say that means I’m going to be Mary Sunshine from now on. You can be sure you’ll still see plenty of cynicism – it’s just in my nature.

Let’s hope the next time I start slacking on this site it won’t be from lack of inspiration, but instead because I’m so busy being motivated and taking steps forward in other parts of my life that I just ran out of time.

Of course, the cynic in me says this will only last until the next downswing in a restless phase – we’ll see.

- Sarah L. Polson

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